My son and my mother dont get along.

2021.12.01 13:21 mynameiseuctace My son and my mother dont get along.

Tldr; My son and my mother don't get along and I'm ready to ask her to leave.
My son is 11 years old. My mother is 62.
She was a good mom until I was 8 and then things went crazy. Around the time I was 9 years old her drug addiction to crack and heroin had gotten out of control and she gave me to my grandparents. She had attempted to stay in my life and visit/call on holidays and important events. My father was absent from birth. It was a rough childhood and I still have feelings of trauma but I manage. Since I was a teen I've led a pretty stable functional life. College, marriage, kids, career, divorce, lots of therapy.. I've done relatively well for myself despite traumas and unfortunate life events. I live with ptsd, anxiety, adhd and pmdd. But I do okay. Life is good.
I welcomed my mother to come live with me a several times throughout the last 14 years so that she could get and stay healthy but after a while she'd leave again. The longest time (before current time )was 8 months and she left. My two children were about 2 and 4 at that time. That was in 2014, the next time was 2016 left again after 2 months. Then she finally decided to get and stay clean in 2019. She wanted to come live with me because some people were after her. And I agreed to help her get out of that life. I wanted to repair my relationship with her and help her feel loved. She’s led a tough life.
It's been about 3 years now.
I knew that we would never have the kind of mother /daughter relationship I longed for as a kid/teen/young adult. She unfortunately wasn't there to build that attachment. She felt more like a sister. And my kids didn't really attach to her either in that grandma/grandkid way. I’d say my youngest is closer to her than my oldest. They acknowledge her and respect her but they don’t really connect with her. Both of my kids get mouthy and rude sometimes with me and her. Their dad gets it to. We both correct them. I handle the parenting when they are home with me. I teach them to not disrespect her. She will say things like “I’m their grandmother!” when explaining why she should be able to discipline them. and I want to respond “yes but it’s more complicated than that” you can’t expect a certain kind of treatment because just you’re a blood relative.
But my mother always has a bone to pick with my oldest. And often it’s unwarranted. She does tend to overreact and make assumptions and take absolutely everything personal. She will guilt him about him lots of things. Like not drawing her pictures or giving her other little creations like my youngest does. To her my oldest is disrespectful and rude. She will say “he acts like he hates me” and then will blame me as the reason they are not close because I’m always intervening or defending my son. Now, when my youngest is throwing a fit about what ever is grinding his gears at that moment, she has more than enough excuses to justify his behavior.
She will complain to me about not spending enough time with her. Once a month I take her to bingo, we also get our nails done monthly and face wax. Every couple weeks we will go out for brunch and grocery shop. I take her to run her errands. I didn’t expect her to feel like this toward me or have issues with my son. I didn’t expect to be her only source of anything. I didn’t expect to be heading into caregiver territory with her either. At 62 shes closet to 87. I guess I just expected her to stay clean and form her own life. She could live with me but still have her own life. Just like she’s had for the last like 25 years, but healthier.
Okay back to my son. My son is a child. She is the adult. I’m so tired of the complaints from her about my son. I know he isn’t a Saint, but he’s a very typical 11 year old boy. Video games, friends, and drawing are his interests. Not every little thing he does is a personal attack against her and I’m over her acting like it is. It’s getting to the point that I feel like asking her start making plans to leave. She’d have no where to go but back to the same area she left, she’d live with her mother. I feel so stuck.. I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t. I just want peace. I feel bad because I know she’s trying in her own way. I bought her a dog in 2020 to give her emotional support and affection because I can’t do that for her because it triggers me. I love her but I'm not sure we can share a home for much longer due to the conflict and contention.
My biggest fear is that he will choose to live with his father because of the issues with him and his grandmother. I don’t want my children to be negatively affected by the conflict with her.
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